Well, here we are.

There is a bit of a chill in the air.  The end of summer? No. There’s a bit of a chill in the air as I have the air-conditioning’s on full.  I’m conducting an experiment to see how warm various jumpers are. Sound like fun? It’s not really. I’m currently wearing a ladies cropped cardigan (in cerise) which is figure hugging, to say the least.  It’s approximately the 20th of about 90 garments that my boss insists on me wearing, to ensure that we’re maintaining “the high levels of extreme cosiness”, that are expected from our devoted customers.  You see, I work for a British Knitwear company called Wool Overs, who have been producing lovely jumpers and cardigans for over 20 years now.  My boss, whom insists on everyone calling him “Mr. Wool” (no-one knows his real name) is obsessed with wool. Well, sweaters and cardigans to be precise. And precise he is; that’s why I’m made to do all these crazy tests.  Last week he had me hanging upside down from the warehouse roof in a blueberry V-neck jumper

How Argyle jumpers are made.

, with the only the arms attached by hooks  in order to make sure the seams are strong enough. Then we had to try and stretch a lemon lambswool polo from one end of the warehouse to the other, to see if it held it’s shape. Suffice it to say, it did not. Not that anyone expected it to, but, as Mr. Wool says; “It’s all valuable data, Mike! It’s imperative we continue to carry out these important tests so we can take jumper making to the next level and the next level after that and then to the NEXT level and..”  Well, you get the general idea.  Anyway, I’ve got to pop to the garage now for a few litres of super-unleaded.  We’re doing flamability tests on our entire cashmere range this afternoon, and guess who has to walk - sorry – ROLL over the hot coals? Old muggins, that’s who…

WM

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