Good morning. After extensive investigations involving 4 different surveillance operations over 3 continents, I can finally reveal the source of the biggest single threat to comfortable, naturally sustainable wool jumpers: The ACRYLIC SHEEP.
I’ve been tracking this beast for over 3 years, using covert farm hands, undercover shepherds, hidden cameras and various wires, and have now pinned down this particular mutant breed to a ‘farm’ in Somerset. Except it’s NOT a farm; it’s a laboratory hidden inside a big shed.
These test-tube sheep have been the source of millions of horrible acrylic sweaters since the late 70’s. The breed is known in the trade as ‘Lambswoolique P-X55-8i’. Arrests have been made, but suffice it to say, this is just the tip of the iceberg.
IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION ABOUT ILLEGAL ACRYLIC SHEEP FACTORIES, PLEASE CONTACT YOUR LOCAL POLICE (MOST FORCES HAVE A DEDICATED ‘SYNTHETIC SHEEP’ TEAM YOU CAN CALL DIRECTLY, OR EMAIL ME IN COMPLETE CONFIDENCE, AND I WILL CONTACT THE APPROPRIATE AUTHORITIES)
Together we can stamp out this vile practice ONCE AND FOR ALL.
October 6, 2009 at 12:58 pm |
I think I may have seen one of these plastic sheeps on a stag-do in Prague last year.
Please take a look at my site on natural products!
http://www.squidoo.com/natural-progression
You’re clearly nuts.
January 6, 2010 at 5:43 am |
Those synthetic sheep are Pure Encapsulations of what’s going to be the end of the world! Evil baa baa black sheep!
February 23, 2010 at 11:21 am |
These test-tube sheep have been the source of millions of horrible acrylic sweaters….
March 5, 2010 at 3:05 pm |
hmm. not evil